Last time we dealt with putting away our anger, clothing our responses to our husband in love, and got right to the dangerous word of submission.  Why is that word so hard?  Is it because when we think of submissive wives we think of women in robot form bowing to their husbands?  News flash.  That description doesn’t appear anywhere in scripture!!!  The ancient Greek word “submit” is essentially a word borrowed from the military. It literally means “to be under in rank.” It speaks of the way that a branch of government is organized among levels of rank. We know that as a person, a Private can be smarter, more talented, and a better person than a General. But he is still under rank to the General. He isn’t submitted to the General so much as a person as he is to the General as a General. In the same way, the wife doesn’t submit to her husband because he deserves it. She submits because he is her husband and she respects the office he holds in the family unit.  Therefore, submission means you are part of a team and the husband is “captain” of the team.  God has gifted us individually and has fitted us with our husbands so that our gifts compliment each other’s, not compete.  You may be the one gifted to handle the finances, but he, your husband, is still the captain.  What does all this have to do with communication?  Well, if you have ever observed any military movies, the captain is always spoken to with respect for the office he holds.  It doesn’t always make him right, but usually the responses he receives are “clothed” to convey the thought and not the anger.  One thing I know about most men is that the minute you start screaming at them the ol’ ears shut down.  This is the spot that the enemy waits for because no one is communicating.

I find it amazing the amount of couples who can have an argument, leave the house going to work or to the store and can be just as pleasant with strangers, but won’t have a word to say to the spouse that God has given them.  See, the real key with this submission issue is that it has nothing to do with whether or not your husband is “right” on a particular issue. It has more to do with lining up our lives according to the word of God.  There is nothing wrong with being angry.  The word of God says to be angry, but to sin not.  Hear me when I tell you that I have done the whole screaming, crying routine and I didn’t always get the result I wanted.  I started giving it to God – every issue.  God dealt with my issues, and with me, and in His timing. The results? Peace in my spirit and in my marriage.  Go ahead, try it.

Posted under Marriage